Overheard at our house

Thanks for saying you guys would come live next door to me. I’d love it. Within a 2 mile radius of our home there are enough houses for all of you. Seriously. There are tons of homes for sale in our area. Bad thing is guy down the street with a 454 in a Chevy S-10 didn’t sell his house and took it off the market. Dood, I can totally see his penis shrinking from my front driveway. The guy constantly revs that damn engine and scares the hell out of my child. I think he needs the flaming dog poo treatment too. Oh, and Ann Marie, that house for sale across the street… right next door to the snotty neighbor kids. You could fling dog poo from your front yard. Come on over sistah.

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This morning the trusty husband was getting ready for work when he hears a high pitched little voice saying, “poke eye.” He walks into the bathroom to find the cat sitting on the counter and little boy with a toy plastic screwdriver. Niiiice.

While laying in bed this morning we were playing hugs and kisses with the boy. The trusty husband says, “smoochy boochy.” To which the boy repeats, “smoochy boochy.” Great, I’m raising a regular Jay over here. I was hoping for the Silent Bob type.

Last night I was in my office while the trusty husband mowed our grass. Luckily he didn’t find a vehicle. There was some speculation on that one. Anyway, I hear this grinding crunch come from the back yard. From the back door I ask, “What was that?” “The stand pipe,” he replies. The husband ran over our septic tank stand pipe with the mower.

Yesterday at lunch:
Trusty Husband: Did you read Amalah’s last post.
Elle: Yes
TH: That was too funny.
Elle: What, that she had a gagillion balls for Noah?
TH: No, the title. ‘All your aball are belong to us’
Elle: Why?
TH: It’s an internets thing. ‘All your base are belong to us‘
Elle: how the hell do you know that?
TH: I’m an internet nerd
Elle: honestly, how do you know something so bizaare?
TH: *smiles*
Elle: What rock have I been living under?

See I need a friend.