Oh Betty, why have you forsaken me?

In a valiant attempt to do something nice for the trusty husband on Valentine?s Day I am met with great defeat. His sister makes the best sugar cookies in the entire world. I don?t know how she does it but they come out perfect every time. Not to mention she makes worlds best frosting too. Everytime I try to make sugar cookies… um, yeah, no. This goes for Chocolate Chip too. I am not exactly sure how one can screw up sugar cookies, but somehow I do it. This is the basis for all mothering. If you can?t make cute Santa and reindeer cookies on Christmas you might as well not be a parent. Isn?t making sugar cookies on the mom test somewhere? Kinda like how fast can you diaper a child in an airport and how many kisses are appropriate for specific levels of boo-boos. That kind of stuff I can handle, but simple sugar cookies? It might as well be quantum physics.

I know I can?t bake sugar cookies. I have tried for years to do so and failed miserably every time. I have tried Martha?s recipe, my grandma?s, my mom?s, even my SIL?s and have come up with flat nasty cookies every time. I have used shortening, butter, margarine and every combo therein. I have used powdered sugar, granulated sugar, generic flour and even expensive flour. Cream of Tartar, Baking soda, salt, and even organic free range eggs. Nada. Same result every time. I even went as far as to purchase new cookie sheets because I was convinced it was the air bake ones that was making them flat. Nope.

Today I thought I couldn?t go wrong with Betty. I pulled out my trusty Betty Crocker cookbook (and yes, I?ve used this recipe before with similar results.) Come on, she has one of the best pizza crust recipes out there. Somewhere around rolling out the dough, that I let chill for 2 hours, I knew this was going to go south in a hurry. Sticky dough. The second batch, more chilled, same result. Why Betty Why? I don?t know why I even try. Lee send me some cookies so I can put my name on them and make your brother feel special.

*Please don?t send me your sugar cookie recipes. I give up.’, ‘Oh Betty, why have you forsaken me?

2 Comment

  1. […] recipe under the sun. They either come out like a hockey puck or with that slimy top. Ick. Even Betty has done me wrong. I’ve tried recipes with applesauce and everything else. All […]

  2. […] coloring).? The sum of those things adds up to many variants on sugar cookies.? We all know my history with sugar cookies.? But for the love of gawd I did not drive an hour to make cookies and go home […]

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