D took me to the NW Flower and Garden Show today. I haven’t been to the show in a few years now. I don’t like large crowds and this event is the epitome of large crowds. We paid $19 per person to get into this place. $38 for 2 hours of entertainment. That is how long it took us to get through this thing. You would think that with me being the plant person that I am it would be an all day event. Not exactly.

Imagine thousands of people crammed together who instantly have become “plant experts.” Every Dick and Jane in the place was the fore most authority on everything botanical. Combine that with the scent of 2 million hyacinths. That is the flower and garden show. Not to mention the morons who buy bundles of willow twigs, plant stakes, long handled pruners, and tomato cages and DON’T check them! Every time you turn around you run the risk of losing an eye.

The best part about the show was the entertainment value. My 2 favorite comments were the following:

Clueless lady #1

Looking at an all pink display garden decorated with a “path” of little pink balls that look distinctly like gumballs, Clueless lady #1 says to clueless friend, “Oh look, tomatoes.”

Uhh, lady those are pink! and they are gumballs!!! Can’t you smell them. Also note the lack of stems and for God’s sake they are PINK!!!

Clueless man #1

Peering into another display garden Clueless man #1 states, “That’s a pretty willow.”

Sir, I hate to inform you that that plant is a Coral Bark Maple.

I am very aware that not everyone has had the luxury of spending years of their life living nothing but plants day in and day out. And I am very aware that I am not the world’s expert on plants, gardening or landscaping. But some of these people are very very funny. There were some students their studying the display gardens and “judging” them. Husbands and wives looking for ideas for their own gardens at home. Ordinarily normal people who have now become plant experts.

The best part about the show was getting to spend the day with D. He had to listen to me blabber on about all kinds of crap he doesn’t really care about. He followed me as I wandered around in circles around the orchid booths trying to decide on if I could kill it or not. I really wanted a new orchid, but I just can’t grow them when they are in moss. I have 6 already, 3 that are blooming and really no space.

It was a good day all in all. Humorous and fun.

4 Comment

  1. jeneflower says: Reply

    I am taking Biology 101 with its corresponding lab right now. I took Biology courses a long time ago, but because they didn’t have labs they apparently didn’t count. So, I am going to have a lot of questions about plants and I will be doing some leaf experiments. Can I ask you questions if I get stuck? Because I think I belong in the clueless category.

  2. Rhonda says: Reply

    I am amazed at the crowds those garden shows draw. I’m like you, I walk around for an hour or two and then I’m out of there. Sounds like you guys had a fun day.

  3. Tricia says: Reply

    I went to a home expo thing with my sister a couple of years ago and couldn’t believe the stuff they were trying to sell. Actually, people were buying tons of this c**p. It was the home shopping network x 5000. magic cleaners, mops, cookware, sponges, etc.

  4. Margaret says: Reply

    I go to this amazing plant farm with my sisters each year (several times). One of my sisters is a certified master gardener, and actually is knowledgeable. My other sisters and I are just hacks — we know enough about our gardens to sound knowledgeable but really we don’t know crap. Inevitably someone will hear us talking about the different varieties and ask us for advice. It’s hilarious.

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