The Traveling Family

Saturday was day 3 of the themeparkpalooza.  The child woke up in yet another foul mood and I’d had enough of it.  At the time he thought of nothing but himself.  Part of that was because the last time we were in Disney it was all about him.  However this time there were 7 other people he needed to think about.  That’s a tall order for a 6 year old.  I knew that, but it was no reason for him to be such a crap head.  He and I got into it that morning about his behavior.  I laid down the law and said that the behavior would not be tolerated, we would not go to Disney until he calmed down (there was much screaming and gnashing of teeth) and eventually I locked myself in the bathroom.  Once he calmed down I said that if he pulled that again we would leave Disneyland.  There were no warnings this time.  I’d had enough.

Saturday morning we had reservations at Goofy’s Kitchen for breakfast.  I’d read wonderful things about how the chefs will go out of their way to cater to ceiliacs.  We had informed the kitchen prior to our arrival and they were ready for us.  I was able to have the best gluten free Mickey waffles and they even got me fresh sausage that hadn’t been in the pan with the bread that soaks up the grease.  The only disappointing thing was that there were only 4 characters at the breakfast.  When we did the Minnie breakfast we saw at least 7-10.  The lack of characters made the kids sad, but the boy was able to eat his weight in food.  I was also able to pocket a few bananas for a food emergency.

After breakfast, as promised, we went straight to Toon Town.  Oh how I loathe Toon Town.  It is crowded, hot and boring.  The best part was we decided to ride the Gadget Go Coaster.  Once again I had to coax the child onto the ride.  He rode with his father, B elected to ride with her dad which left me and Gretchen to ride together.  When it was our turn to ride Gretchen and I looked at this thing and wondered how the hell we were both going to fit into the seat.  They are very small seats made for 2 kids or an adult and a small child.  It certainly was not made for two grown adults.  Somehow we managed to cram our asses into the seat.  About half way up the first hill we looked at each other and said, “How are we going to get out of this thing?”  We then proceeded to laugh our asses off the rest of the 20 second ride.  We didn’t laugh them off quite enough because at the end we were certain that we would just keep riding the ride all day long because they wouldn’t be able to get us out.  Fortunately we got out, not sure how.

After lunch the family decided that we were going to ride the Haunted Mansion.  Yet again the boy freaked out about not wanting to ride it.  Instead of nicely saying that he didn’t want to ride it he pitched a fit about nothing demanding that we go back to Toon Town and then demanding that we ride Pirates instead.  I kindly informed him that we would ride Pirates after the Haunted Mansion, but it was B’s turn to pick and this is what we were doing.  Once again, it’s not all about you child.  This was the moment that the child decided to pitch a royal fit as we were walking into Adventureland.  Remember my threat earlier in the day?  The one that said if he was a crab we would leave the park.  That was the moment that I became “that mom.”  I informed him that we were leaving.  I walked over to the family and said, “Oleg is choosing to throw a fit so we are now going to go sit outside the park.  I’ll text you when we are ready to come back in.”  I held tightly to my son’s hand and walked away.  He then turned into a cartoon character yanking my arm and not walking as I pulled him down the sidewalk.  As we walked down Main Street he was blaming me for his behavior, telling me that I was ruining his vacation.  I marched him out of Disneyland and over to a bench where he continued to cry and berate me.  Want to get the best photo of the gates of Disneyland?  You have to do it in the middle of the afternoon.  Look.

However, if you’re sitting outside the gates of Disneyland in the middle of the afternoon this is probably what’s on the other side of you.

A good 20-30 minutes later and a lot of me trying different tactics to make the child understand his actions I finally found one that stuck.  I asked him to really think about his behavior and when he was ready to calmly talk to me about it and apologize I would talk to him.  I then handed him a bag of cashews and ignored him.  5 minutes later he looked at me and said, “mom, I’m ready to apologize.”  He explained his actions, said he was sorry and politely asked if he could go back to Disneyland.  I agreed and we walked hand-in-hand back through the gates.  While we were walking he looked up at me and said, “Mom, I’m going to be more respectful now.”  My heart just about melted.  I was so proud of him for recognizing his actions, acknowledging them and apologizing.  I told him that we would do something special because he showed me that he could be so kind.  Part of me was thinking that I really shouldn’t reward his behavior, but I wanted to reward the good behavior.  I gave him the option.  He could ride Pirates (the previous deal was he couldn’t ride Pirates unless he rode the Haunted Mansion because that was just his way of getting what he wanted).  So he could ride Pirates or we could go to the Mad Hatter and he could pick out a new ear hat.  He chose ear hat.  My boy and I went to the ear hat store, picked out a new ear hat for him and had his name embroidered on the back.  I told him that this was an anti-crabby hat.  As long as he was wearing Mickey ears he couldn’t be crabby.  Why oh why didn’t I think of that sooner?  The child was perfectly behaved the rest of the time in Disneyland.

Right… I was telling you about our adventurecation.  I got distracted with work.  When we left off we had spent our first day at Disneyland.

Day 2 was spent at California Adventure.  One of the trusty sister-in-laws wanted to see one of her girlfriends from middle school.  It just so happened that they were both going to be at Disney on the same day.  They found a 20 minute window of time where they could meet up.  It just so happened that it was outside Ariel’s Grotto in California Adventure.  We all tagged along just for fun.

After the meet and greet we spent the day toodling around California Adventure trying to stave off the crab monster, affectionately known as my child.  I had packed snacks, we fed him treats, we took him on rides.  No amount of entertainment or food would make this child happy.  He wanted to see Toon Town.  Problem was, Toon Town was about as far away from where we were at the moment.  We promised the child that first thing the next day we would see Toon Town.  He begrudgingly agreed.  Needless to say if I don’t go back to California Adventure again I would be ok with that.

The “highlight” of the day came when we had somehow talked the child into riding Grizzly River Run.  It is the giant tube ride that gets you wet.  It isn’t a roller coaster per say, but a bounce about fun on a hot day ride.  We had bee-lined straight for the fast pass line when we got to the park and our return was right before lunch time.  When it was time to get on the ride our line was very short because of the fast pass and the whole time the child was bouncy and mostly happy.  We could see a bit of fear in his eyes.  Of course it is the same look he had when I tried to get him to go on a playground slide.  Eventually I just had to push him down.  The child is so overly cautious he would sit in his room all day if you didn’t make him do something.  This was another one of those moments*.  We knew he would have fun so we coaxed him onto the ride.  B was also cautious, but she became my buddy when it came to rides.  She and I rode most all of the rides together.  So we get on the ride and in order to fill the tube a cast member puts a single rider in with us.  The kid must have been about 16 or 17 years old, if that.  We go up the first lift hill and the whole time the child is worrying himself into old age.  “I don’t want to go down a hill.”  “I don’t want to go down backwards.”  It was driving us nuts.  First hill done, WHEEEE!  “That was fun!”  GAH!  We bounce about down this river thing, round a corner and come to the “big hill.”  The tube goes into a set of gates and then it drops you over the edge.  There was another tube in the gates and we bounced into the gates, then the tube behind us bounced into us and the tube behind that…  There were about 8 tubes stacked up at this set of gates.  So we’re just about hanging off the edge of this hill and going no where.  The ride’s pre-recorded message that makes it seem like part of the ride comes on to say there’s been a delay.  All the while the child starts to worry.  And worry… And worry.  Everyone in the boat is trying to reassure him that it’s going to be fine.  Unfortunately, it got to the point that no amount of reasoning with this child was going to work.  We were on the ride, there was no way out except down the hill.  Of course we were stuck so we were all trapped with the crying.  After about 20 minutes the ride started going again and the tube in the gates was pitched over the edge which meant we were next.  Oh the crying.  We get pushed into the gates and pitched over the edge while the child is yelling, “I DON’T WAN…WHEEEEE!”  We get to the bottom and he says, “That was fun, I don’t know what I was afraid of.”  Had it not been for the seatbelt restraining me I would have reached across the tube and pulled a Homer Simpson on this child.  I guess this is the point where I should mention that just the day before he rode Big Thunder Mountain Railroad and squeed the whole time.

The purpose of the whole trip was a family reunion.  We left California Adventure a little early so the kids could swim (I napped) and we could get ready for the reunion.  We had a lovely time with the family.  Derek’s aunt tried to make a point to have food that we all could eat.  Derek’s cousin is a vegetarian, B is very particular in her eating habits and I don’t eat dairy or gluten.  It was a tall order.  Luckily there was plenty for all of us.  We had a great evening and all fell into bed when we got back to the hotel… despite that nap.

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*please don’t think that I would ever make my child do something that truly would be scary for a 6 year old or something that could possibly hurt him.  I am not that kind of parent and I do know my child better than you do.

Thank you all for advice.   We figured out the issue.  We think he’s getting 6 year molars.  If you remember molars and our family don’t mix.  Let’s move on shall we?

At the asscrack of dawn on August 2nd we set out for what we later dubbed Adventurecation.  The plan was for it to be an 11 night road trip that took us through Sequoia National Park to Disneyland to San Diego and back up the California coast.  This wasn’t the vacation we originally intended last year.  We went to Disneyland last Fall for the boy’s birthday.  However, a week after booking the previous Disney trip Derek’s aunt organized a family reunion.  Thing was… they live in Southern California.  About 15 minutes from Disneyland to be exact.  We figured that if we were going back to Disney, and driving this time, we would take our time and make the most of it.  It sounded like a good plan.  For the most part it was… except for that time that I wanted to jump out of the car in Vacaville, CA.

We were up late on the 1st preparing for an early departure the next morning.  I had a carefully orchestrated plan of packing and loading the car and being in bed by 9:00 so I wasn’t a complete and utter crank at 3:30 a.m..  By the way, whomever invented 3:30 in the morning should be shot.  Apparently writing things down on a piece of paper wasn’t good enough for the organizational overloards because at about 5:00 my husband came home and promptly started taking the front part of my car apart.  What the hell?!  Those organizational overloards gave us the big middle finger and a headlight had burned out.  Hey we still had one.  Wasn’t that good enough?  Dammit, I should have made an Excel spreadsheet.

We get the car packed, fall into bed only for the alarm to go off at 3:30 a.m..  I really have to find that guy and kick him in the nuts.  At 4:15 we get the kid out of bed, throw some clothes on him, stuff him in the car and off we go… only to make potty stops every hour until south of Portland.

The first day’s plan was to drive to Sacramento and stay the night with Derek’s sister. Plan accomplished.  We rolled into Sac-town at about 5:00.  So far so good.  The next morning was the first in Adventurecation.  We made it to Sequoia relatively early in the day (3:00 in the afternoon).  The northern part of the park is beautiful and the child had his nose buried in an iPod.  I made him take off the headphones and put away the iPod because gosh darn it we drove all this way so HE could see really big trees and he was going to enjoy it.  Never mind the really really big trees are in the southern part of the park, but we are going to enjoy this family road trip moment.

We made it to the campground and after yet another potty stop at the visitor’s center we were ready to check in.  The park ranger informed us that we were staying in a very active bear area.  I was aware of  bear activity considering one of the highlights of the campground are individual bear boxes.  She briefed us of all proper bear protocol.  There were things like clear every scrap of food out of your car and put it in the bear box.  All toiletries must be removed from the car and put in the bear box.  Remove the child’s car seat from the car and set it outside of the car.  Don’t wash dishes, brush your teeth or wash your hands at the faucet at your site.  All grey water must be dumped in the bathroom, but oh we should probably mention that the restroom near your site is under construction so you have to hike your grey water down the hill to the other bathroom to dump it.  And if you need to use the bathroom there are two porta-potties nearby.  Have a nice time and don’t get eaten by bears.

Determined to not be scared of bears we followed every last bit of her advice and I strongly warned the boys that they were to not get a single dish dirty.  That worked out well.

Once we had camp set up we were off to see “the big tree.”  The scenery was beautiful.  There is something about being in the woods that is magical to me.  I love it.  We walked down the path to the General Sherman tree and holy hell is it ever huge.  The last time I saw it was about 17 or 18 year ago.  They’ve made considerable improvements to the park and we had a nice time.  It wasn’t too busy and we were able to get a shot of the boy with the biggest tree in the world.

After not quite a national lampoons moment at the General Sherman tree we headed back to the campground for dinner.  We also discovered that there was a beautiful river that ran through the campground.  We hurried through dinner so the child could explore the rocks and water.  That was the point where I said I could stay there forever.  Part of me wish we had.  crawling on large rocks in the middle of a river brings back childhood memories that are so precious to me.  One night in Sequoia was not nearly enough.

I realize it has been almost a week since we’ve been home from Disneyland and I’ve complained about our trip home, but never really mentioned the trip in general.  The trusty husband and I have made many trips to Disneyland in the past and this was our second as a family of 3.  Let’s not discuss the first one.  I didn’t really write about it to begin with.

So, our first trip to Disneyland as a family…

First I have to say that if you ever have the chance to visit Disneyland at Halloween time please do so.  The weather may be slightly iffy, but it is worth it.  I won’t say it is less crowded.  It’s not.  I’m convinced that Disneyland is never not crowded.

They dress the park up for the season and the Haunted House like the Nightmare Before Christmas.  It is a hoot.  It is also one of the only times you’ll get to see the villain characters.  If you are a big villain fan, like me, you’ll love it.  Besides, you get wonderful photos.

Gideon was one of my favorite characters at the park.  He interacted with us as opposed to just posing for a photo.  The child was less certain about the villains, but we loved it.  (We missed Cruella, Frollo and Honest John, but did see The Queen and Gideon)

The other fun part is that the main characters are dressed up in their Halloween finest.  Mickey was a (not so scary) vampire, Minnie was a witch, Goofy was a skeleton and Donald was a pumpkin. This was the best photo I could get of the boy and Donald.  The duck was more interested in eating the ballon.

So tips and tricks about navigating Disneyland with little ones in tow.  It depends on if you like to plan or not.  We are not big planners.  We basically buy plane tickets, show up and do whatever feels good at the moment.  This trip was no exception.  So here goes.

1. Don’t go to Disneyland 3 days after your mother-in-law has brain surgery.  While our family was ok with the situation and we had siblings at home to take care of things the stress caused a momentary lapse of reason thus resulting in me forgetting to pack important things.  The good news is that if you forget something there is a Target somewhat nearby that you can pick up what you left behind.

2. You will notice at Target that they sell wine.  You may think to yourself that you will save some money by purchasing wine at said Target and forgo your evening drink at a restaurant.  This sounds like a great plan.  However, at the end of a long day of walking and potential child meltdowns you will pay the $45 for a glass of wine at the restaurant and then go back to your hotel and drink the wine there and spend a week of a family vacation in a drunken stupor.  It totally wouldn’t know about that.

3. If you think the wine thing sounds like a great tip, bring your own corkscrew or be prepared to purchase one at Target.  There are exactly 2 bottles of screw top wine available at the Target.  I tried both.  Neither are great.

4. Carry an umbrella with you at all times.  If you don’t it will rain.  If you carry the umbrella you will ensure that the weather will be perfect.

5. A hotel within walking distance (right across the street from the park) is a great idea… in theory.  The nicer hotels are a short bus ride away, which will cost you a little more in hotel prices and bus fare.  The trade-off is that you aren’t right. across. the. street.  Where they do fireworks.  You can still hear the fireworks from the further away hotels.  It just won’t wake you up from your drunken stupor.

6. While you are at Target contemplating between screw top #1 and screw top #2 (go with #2) pick up some snacks.  You can bring food into the park and you will need emergency granola bars to stave off the cranky unless you like to pay $2 for a banana.

7. You might think your 6 year old child would enjoy Space Mountain all duded up for Halloween… I assure you he will not.

8.  It’s A Small World still makes you stabby.  Only now it makes you stabby in bright neon colors.

9. Don’t expect to pay under $30 for any meal.  And by all means don’t expect that meal to be hot… or taste good.

10. Don’t visit one of those “ride planner” websites.  That’s just silly.  Have fun and go with the flow.  It is great in theory to plan out every moment of your Disneyland experience, but you might miss something like a show put on by the fire brigade or listening to the strolling pirates while having lunch outdoors at Cafe Orleans.

If you want real tips on Disneyland email me.  I have many of them including what not to miss and what to skip.

Alternate title… who knew that could happen?

About 2 months ago Derek and I booked a trip to Disneyland for Oleg’s 6th birthday.  The plan was to leave on the 18th and return on the 23rd of October.  The plane tickets and hotel were paid for and the Disney tickets were already purchased.  5 days before we were supposed to leave Derek’s mom was diagnosed with a brain tumor.  We fretted all weekend long about how we could reschedule the trip.  Wonderful things happen and mom came through surgery with flying colors, is doing well and Derek’s sister is there.  Dad gave us his approval to take the trip.

Yesterday we spent the day traveling to Southern California for our great Disney adventure.  The whole day I kept remembering things I had forgotten to pack.  I forgot socks for the boy, the shampoo I made a point to purchase the day before we left, hair spray, my allergy medication, my curling iron and/or flat iron and a few other things.  Derek looked at me and said, “what’s wrong with you?”  Gee, I wonder.

Not to be deterred by the bumpy start to our trip we were determined to have fun.

The weather forecast this morning didn’t look that stellar.  I left Washington in search of sunny warm weather.  Yeah… not so much.

We ran errands to have breakfast and pick up a few of the things I had forgotten the off to the happiest place on earth.  The first rid was Pirates at the request of the child.  When we got off the ride it was pouring outside.  I have never seen so many poncho clad tourists in my life.  Tomorrow doesn’t look much better.  So bad in fact that I purchased umbrellas.  I will not let this rain ruin my Disney vacation.

We think the child’s poo issues are on the road to recovery. ?We still aren’t sure about his ability to ever have dairy again. ?Because of my own food related woes I don’t wish that on anyone. ?What I can say is that he’s been over a week accident free. ?This is a very very good thing.

Moving on…

Did I mention that I’m going to China for 15 days this summer? ?I may have mentioned it briefly, but haven’t gone into depth about it. ?On July 14th me and a friend are taking a group of 3 teenage girls to China. ?We are traveling with 2 other groups with an organization called ChinaConnect. ?Up until now this whole trip has been one of those in the distant future things. ?However, I leave in 30 days. ?That is one month and after today it will be LESS than a month. ?Did I mention it was 15 days? ?And the boys aren’t going? ?I waffle between simply giddy and freaking the hell out. ?I haven’t been out of the country in almost 4 years, I know about 5 words/phrases in Chinese (and one of them is NOT where is the bathroom) and I’m going with youth so I cannot drink the whole time. ?15 days? ?I can manage.

In all honesty I’m very excited to go on the trip. ?The kids we are taking are 3 amazing girls and the friend I’m going with is a very good one. ?I’m quite glad I’m going with her. ?This is the first long term youth trip we’ve done just the two of us. ?Usually Derek is with us. ?It is going to be an adventure that is for sure. ?Her job is to find the “safe” toilets in the places we visit and my job is to be the first one to go into them. ?Hey, I’ve peed on the ground in Mexico, I’m not proud.

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In other life news… yeah, there is nothing.

Ok, maybe something.

The weed issue in our front yard had gotten so bad that Derek is now considering hiring a landscaper to come out and take care of it all. ?As in, she came to our house (at some point, we weren’t home) to look at it and she’ll give me a quote on Tuesday. ?Derek’s response was, “and I’ll turn around and write her a check.” ?And then I blacked out for a minute. ?My husband does not part easily with money for a project he can do himself. ?Back of our house fell off… we can fix that. ?We’ll see what the quote comes in at.

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Now here, have some photos.

The boy thought he’s stick butter cups in his hat. ?Then mom and I made him wear it like g-money.

I can’t believe how big my girl is getting.

We have a hard time remembering she’s just an 8 month old puppy.