Headline: Brain on Vacation to Aruba

So I’m totally changing my name to Cashmere Mist Twix. In fact I think we all should be our alter egos. kate, you are officially now Toasty Christmas. Ann Marie you can be Midge*. Rachel can be Ribbons Accord and Beth is now Flebe**.

Now that we have that out of the way, anyone posting as Jen, Jenn, Jenny, Jenefer, Jennifer, Jennie or any derivation thereof must do the Meme and go by their best name. Or else I will make up names for you and you sooooo don’t want me to do that.

The Great Mofo Delurk 2007One more thing… It’s delurk day. Which I am making into Delurk Week. Delurk and I might gift you something super cool like a new header. Or you could just delurk to make me feel better.


Try as I might creative parenting is a fleeting act. I don’t know if I’m tired, my brain is over taxed or what, but I can’t seem to get it together. Maybe my child is now smarter than I am. This is a distinct possibility. The child has sucked every last viable brain cell out of my head save two. And I seriously think those last two brain cells took a holiday to Aruba. Bitches. Why didn’t they take me?

This morning we have dealt with the child harassing the fat cat by pinning her in a corner despite his mother telling him 3 times to stop harassing the cat. He has pulled of the heat grate in his bedroom (lord only knows what he put down the open hole), he snatched the toilet paper out of the bathroom (he may have been preparing a sneak TP the mommy attack), he unloaded 1/2 a box of wipes and then tried to give the other cat a bath with apple juice. That was all before 8:30 this morning. He is currently trying to buckle the sock monkey’s seatbelt with an xbox controller cord. In the grand scheme of things it only endangers our indigenous sock monkey population so I’m not too concerned.

However, my usual method of infraction and naughty chair time is not working. Removal of offending toys or privileges works only to an extent. I need to be more creative, and more positive. Sure, I’m the Montessori type mom who doesn’t lavish praise upon my child in an attempt to make him use the brain God gave him, but I should be careful what I ask for. In typical 3 year old fashion the child has figured out that x behavior will push mom’s button so I will push it Hawrd! Mom goes nuts and boy smiles.

We are going to implement a reward system in this house. I don’t exactly know how to explain it to the child, but I’ll give it a shot. Hell, I’m not 100% sure on how it is going to work. All I know is I’ve got to do something. That whole listening camp is a great idea, but it wouldn’t work with my little Howard Hughes. Wish me luck.

*You get to be Midge because Midge was so better than Barbie

**Flebe because that is the best Star Wars name EVAH!

24 Comment

  1. Ok, I’ll do it, while I really like my Gansta name of Spumoni Krinkle, I have to stop and think about it when typing as Spumoni and Krinkle are not common words to say, let alone type. Cereal Birch makes a great hippy name, but I really am not the granola type. The only major city starting with an E that I could think of was ElPaso and Elsasser ElPaso falls under the same typing rules regarding Spumoni Krinkle. While I may not be a superhero, I do sometimes feel like super mom at times so The Pink Cosmo wins. Speaking of which, pass the cranberry juice!

  2. I wanna change my name and take my husband’s (car’s) last name (cause it sounds cooler) so I’m giving notice that I am now Ribbons Durango (instead of Ribbons Accord). Maybe I am cool after all, I just have to think harder. I think some of my brain cells went to Aruba with yours. My kids are all pushing my buttons lately too, and I’ve got 4 (they’re ganging up on me!).

  3. Um… I want to be included in the alter ego game. 🙁

  4. Wendy says: Reply

    It’s Mitzi Odyssey here to tell you that if you find that one something that trips your kid’s trigger, even for just one day, use it for all it’s worth! In fact, when dealing with very smart children, use anything and everything you can to keep ahead of the little buggers. It certainly isn’t easy…..

  5. Rebecca says: Reply

    Okay, I’m delurking to comment because for the brief time in which I attempted my own blog, I found it terrible that no ever commented even though the counter said that people had read it. I don’t know that the listening camp is a great idea for boys. I have a two year old boy..I think that the best way to get a little guy to behave is to run him until he is near exhausted twice a day. Take him to somewhere he can climb and let him go over and over and over again. They love it and they are too tired to really misbehave, and sometimes they go to bed early.
    My son has started putting himself in time out when he knows I’m about to as if to say “this doesn’t bother me.” Its hard when they start out so smart. Take advantage of the weather before it goes away and keep him running….JMHO

  6. Ohhh….Pick Me! Pick Me! Pick Me!! …. I SOOOO need a new header!! 🙂

    ha, sorry, that’s not the only reason I’m delurking.

    Annnyway, since my child has started daycare, I’ve noticed an interesting difference in him. He is exhausted by the end of the day. Fortunately, daycare has not seemed to affect his attachment so far (which is really fortunate since – at this very moment – I really do need to work to pay the bills). So let’s think about this. I don’t overly lavish praise, but when he IS behaving, I pay very good attention to him. It’s sort of one of those positive reinforcement things. (an interestingly – but not surprisingly – enough, when I pay attention to him is when he is less likely to misbehave). When he is being horribly whiney (oh like right now) or just over all “difficult”, I try really hard to ignore. Very difficult.

    So I’ve pretty much not helped you at all. Except to say that we’re close to where you are – except we are just turning 2 instead of 3. So you are one blessed year closer to having a more pleasant parenting experience! 🙂

  7. or, as my mom would say – one year closer to having a teenager. geesh.

  8. Hey, I think my last 2 brain cells might be with yours in Aruba! So not fair that we didn’t get to go too.

  9. Ah! Ms elle!

    I’m having a delightful time right now, though the rain is putting a hamper on my journey. Rest assured, I’m safe, dry and doing just fine right now.

    I’ve been lurking for the past week, so I believe that I should, um, ‘delurk’.

    I hope you, CS, the boy, Julius and Not Julius are doing well.

    Until next time,

  10. Button pushing… how fun. Quin has been driving me nuts also, and last week I would end each day by yelling at him during the night routine (it had been a downward spiral for several hours before bedtime). On Sunday I took a break (albeit with Gretchen) and went out to a friend’s house for a couple of hours, went by another friend’s new business, then went back (after dinner) to help set up the new business. Being gone for about 5 “toddler awake” hours really helped reset my sanity. If D is willing, take a weekend day off and do NOTHING with the family (immediate or extended) and nothing with any other child. Or, better yet, take the whole weekend, leave after breakfast, and return after bedtime. Not doing bedtime, naptime, or the afternoon grumps for one day really energized me.

    Praising for good behavior works well for me, for a short time. However, one thing that his Montessori school has taught me that is saving my sanity is that he can do his work while I do my work. This way, I can do “computer work” while he does “train work” and I can set a timer (usually for 15 minutes), then we do “train work” together for a while. Or, I’ll play with him for a bit (with the timer on), then go do my work. He’s learning to follow the timer, and when it bings we get to do something different.

    I also notice a huge behavioral difference on days we go outside to play or take a walk. He’s much more mellow at night, and he follows directions. A book I’m reading (“The Good Son” by Micheal Gurian – strong religious overtones) mentions that toddlers need to have some time each day with unplanned gross motor skills time, and some time with planned gross motor skills. For example, we will walk to the park (planned time – we’re going to a specific destination), he runs around like a maniac (unplanned time), then we walk back. Usually we get home and I have a happy, although hungry, little boy who’s happy and willing to listen. I have no idea what I’m going to do when the snow flies and I’m not willing to walk on the ice; maybe get a small snow shovel and let him shovel off the back deck!

    Signed – The Green Water

  11. Ok, that got a little long! Sorry about that! Both kids are sleeping, and I don’t quite know what to do with myself!

  12. LMAO, I love Flebe, it’s pretty good! And your delurk button…is it for stealing or what?

    What do I feel compelled to always steal from you?

    Watch out, your head is next.

  13. How often does a MOFO have to delurk around here to get a cool nickname?

  14. Uhm… Because I heard ‘Pushy Comments Bitch” was still open…

  15. Jenny says: Reply

    I just love being told what to do, at least by a woman 🙂

    And this was much easier than trying to think of something after working 13 hours, lots of breastfeeding, making treats for a mommy meeting tomorrow, cleaning the downstairs 600 square feet, managing dogs, and getting infant to bed.


  16. Lena says: Reply

    Fine, I did it too.

    Please buy tickets to Harlequin ‘King’ Jetta on The Scrapbook Snow Tour coming to a city near you.

  17. Midge says: Reply

    Sooooo…when are we getting drunk?

  18. Ronda Farrell says: Reply

    De-lurking. Creative parenting has my mind working overtime but I’m still not getting ahead of these two. Lots of physical activity seems to keep them tired and behaving. On the days they don’t get it I have two purposely naughty little ones — I think they like to get me riled up. They just laugh and laugh with a mischevious grin. So far time ins work pretty well. We sit with them on our lap face down. Boooring for them and not fun. They’re still with us but not getting cuddled.


  19. Jenny2 says: Reply

    Delurking is fun! Oh wait, I did that months ago. I love my new names, btw.

  20. chou2 says: Reply

    commenting, but not truly delurking… have been only slightly lurking so far. but, DAMN, could I use a new header (as will be obv. to anyone who sees my blog…)

    chou-chou, AKA Doblis Bit-o-honey

  21. I am hardly a lurker – but here’s your comment anyway. I sure can use a new header – my blog is so damn tired. I need a whole new gig.

    Question – have you heard of people just changing their URL, or am I better off just retiring my current blog and starting a whole new one. My URL ‘goingtobeparents’ doesn’t make much sense anymore….

  22. i’m so glad you took control of the variants-of-jennifer crisis in blogland. make them take the quiz! now i’ll go read the rest of the post…

  23. SO insulted to be considered a newbie. but, being patient.

    just think of the be-yooo-tiful header you could make me…maybe a piece of toast eaten into the shape of russia…with Christmas trees spelling out the tiitle.

    see–i really need help.

  24. will be curious to see how a reward system goes with a (genius) two-year-old…

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