Lauri mentioned that she could beat me at the strange family contest.? Jenny did for a while, but I win with my most recent escapade to my Uncle’s wedding.? So I am challenging all of my readers to a strange family contest.? Your goal is to try and beat me.? Here are the rules.
1) I will start with an oddity about my family.
2) you will leave a comment with something about your family that is stranger than mine.
3) if your family is stranger I will post your thing and up you with one of mine. then the game continues.
4) you may leave your comment openly (if you aren’t scared of your family forcing you to attend a 4 hour tent revival) or you may post them anonymously and then email me at elle@lifeofelle.com to let me know what comment was yours.? If your thing beats mine I will post your comment anonymously and up you with one of mine.
5) If you best me in the contest I will bring you a prize from my upcoming vacation (and I’m going somewhere cool)
6) I will not use names or identifying information about my family.? Everyone will be referred to Aunt, Uncle, or Cousin.? I will not use material that could be potentially harmful to family relationships.? All of this information is well known fact.? This information is only from my dad’s side of the family.? My mom’s side is relatively normal with the exception of some neurosis.
7) the contest will continue until someone wins (could be by the end of the day, could be by the end of the week).
Let’s begin shall we?
Elle: My mom’s brother married my dad’s sister.? We don’t live in Kentucky.
Yep, I started soft. You guys are good.? That first round was a tough one, but I’ll have to go with this is the top on the list so far.
Jens: And I have a cousin married 3 times and she is under 27.
Elle:? My uncle is an alcoholic (many of my family stories start this way).? When he was young he dated a woman and she got pregnant.? She told him if he wanted to be part of the baby’s life he had to sober up.? He didn’t she left.? Uncle continuted drinking, woman got married.? Uncle was state mandated into rehab, woman got divorced.? In the mean time Uncle had baby with another woman, woman had 3 babies with former husband.? Once Uncle was sober and woman was divorced they hooked up… got married.? They have 5 children and only one is biologically theirs.
This next one is a tie.
Lauri: My aunt never told me that my father passed away
DebiP: I have two uncles that between them have been married 9 time (they are both in their 50?s now) and they have been married to the same woman but at different times and only once. They have however dated each others ex?s after the divorce and compared notes?YIKES
Elle: My parents divorced when I was 8.? After that my dad became a weekend dad.? My dad is an alcoholic (see) and had a hard time holding down a decent job.? He also couldn’t find a place of his own to live so he was sort of a nomad.? Each weekend he was at a different house.? Once he stayed with one of my Uncles.? He thought he’d be there quite a while and the single wide was big enough that I could have my own room.? Dad and I stopped by one weekend so he could show me the new place.? He was giving me a tour and said, “and this is going to be your room.”? He opened the door to my Uncle’s pot drying room.? At least they cleaned it out before I came to stay the next time.
I was a little confused by Lyndsey’s comment.? In fact the trusty husband got lost somewhere around the secont paragraph.? However, the last one got me.
Lyndsey: Cousin Bobbi Jo (not real name, but it is a double first name) got married at 13. At the age of 15, she?d had enough of being a housewife and ran away to join the circus, leaving her husband and 3 children behind. They caught up with her a few towns later and brought her back?not sure if she ever made it to the circus.
Elle: My Uncle (aforementioned pot grower) eventually found himself a live-in girlfriend.? After a while together she got pregnant.? Girlfriend gave birth to baby boy and within 6 months of giving birth was pregnant again.? They are the two closest in age of the 23 grandchildren (closer than my brothers).? Story doesn’t end there.? When baby girl was roughly 14 (I dont’ know the exact age) Uncle and live-in broke up, she was a little crazy (that’s a theme in our family).? Uncle then finds out that baby girl wasn’t really his, but rather the love child of some other dude that live-in was doing on the side.
Wow, you guys are making things tough for me.? This is a good one, but lessened by the fact that the poster is from Georgia.
Kimberly: <!– /* Font Definitions */ @font-face {font-family:”Cambria Math”; panose-1:2 4 5 3 5 4 6 3 2 4; mso-font-charset:0; mso-generic-font-family:roman; mso-font-pitch:variable; mso-font-signature:-1610611985 1107304683 0 0 159 0;} @font-face {font-family:Calibri; panose-1:2 15 5 2 2 2 4 3 2 4; mso-font-charset:0; mso-generic-font-family:swiss; mso-font-pitch:variable; mso-font-signature:-1610611985 1073750139 0 0 159 0;} @font-face {font-family:Consolas; panose-1:2 11 6 9 2 2 4 3 2 4; mso-font-charset:0; mso-generic-font-family:modern; mso-font-pitch:fixed; mso-font-signature:-1610611985 1073750091 0 0 159 0;} /* Style Definitions */ p.MsoNormal, li.MsoNormal, div.MsoNormal {mso-style-unhide:no; mso-style-qformat:yes; mso-style-parent:””; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:11.0pt; font-family:”Calibri”,”sans-serif”; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:”Times New Roman”; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} p.MsoPlainText, li.MsoPlainText, div.MsoPlainText {mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-link:”Plain Text Char”; margin:0in; margin-bottom:.0001pt; mso-pagination:widow-orphan; font-size:10.5pt; font-family:Consolas; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:”Times New Roman”; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} span.PlainTextChar {mso-style-name:”Plain Text Char”; mso-style-noshow:yes; mso-style-priority:99; mso-style-unhide:no; mso-style-locked:yes; mso-style-link:”Plain Text”; mso-ansi-font-size:10.5pt; mso-bidi-font-size:10.5pt; font-family:Consolas; mso-ascii-font-family:Consolas; mso-hansi-font-family:Consolas;} .MsoChpDefault {mso-style-type:export-only; mso-default-props:yes; mso-ascii-font-family:Calibri; mso-ascii-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-fareast-font-family:Calibri; mso-fareast-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-hansi-font-family:Calibri; mso-hansi-theme-font:minor-latin; mso-bidi-font-family:”Times New Roman”; mso-bidi-theme-font:minor-bidi;} @page Section1 {size:8.5in 11.0in; margin:1.0in 1.0in 1.0in 1.0in; mso-header-margin:.5in; mso-footer-margin:.5in; mso-paper-source:0;} div.Section1 {page:Section1;} –> My uncle by marriage was engaged to Aunt #1, had sex with her underage sister (Aunt #2) then proceeded to marry Aunt #1. They subsequently divorced 20 years later and he married Aunt #2. They divorced after he was accused of ?unseemly? behavior with his niece. And we?re from Georgia (cue Dueling Banjos).
Elle: My cousin was married at age 17.? It was legal even without parental consent because she married into a Native American tribe.? That husband fathered two of her 9 children.? Yes, 9.? This cousin is 33 years old and has given birth to 9 children.? That is an average of 1 child every 1.7 years.? None of them are multiples.? 2 have 1 dad, 2 have a different dad and we aren’t sure how many fathers the others have. ? How many does she have in her custody?? 1.? She has given up every single one of them for adoption before the state could take them away.? (In WA if the state takes away a child due to drug abuse they will also remove any subsequent children)? Every time she gives birth (children 5-9) she has told my grandmother that she has “been fixed.”
Pfftt…they aren’t related…you started with a soft pitch! So I guess I’ll respond in kind.
I made out with my cousin. And I’m not from Kentucky. He wasn’t my cousin at the time – we went to school together. But his aunt married my dad a year or two later. So family functions were weird for awhile. And my husband dated his step-sister. Again, it was before his mom married her dad but I like to tease him about it anyway.
a sister is engaged to a cousins ex husband
That is not strange that causes double cousins and I have them on all four sides of my grandparents.
Here is my strange fact: I have an aunt dying of kidney cancer (that isn’t strange) and she is making comments on the family who have not sent her get well cards. She is actually keeping score.
My uncle of 55, did the worm and breakdanced at my wedding. Out of the blue.
And I have a cousin married 3 times and she is under 27.
ok, I can’t think of anything really good now.. bummer
My aunt never told me that my father passed away ( we were estranged, he left my Mom when I was two, but he and I talked on the phone now & then). My aunt never put an obituary in the paper and did not have a funeral… none of his children found out until six months after the fact.
to this day I do not know what her motives were, but almost sure it is related to inheritance issues.
Now that is screwed up
I have two uncles that between them have been married 9 time (they are both in their 50’s now) and they have been married to the same woman but at different times and only once. They have however dated each others ex’s after the divorce and compared notes…YIKES
I’ve been lurking here for a while, but I couldn’t resist delurking. How many messed up family things do you want?
Great-Grandma C. and her sister T. married Great-Grandfather H. and his brother A. Kids are double first cousins all around. Kid of note: Grandfather H.J. H.J.’s father died tragically when H.J. was 18 months old–he fell off a logging truck and developed blood poisoning.
Great-Grandma C.’s mother, M.C. had a sister, K, whose grandson, W.H., is my Grandma D’s dad. Grandma D married Grandfather H.J. Grandma D. and Grandfather H.J. are cousins (D’s great-grandmother and H.J.’s grandmother are sisters.) They didn’t know this until they were engaged, but got married anyway, and are now still married after 48 years, 3 kids, and 9 grandkids. All but one of the grandchildren are in gifted education classes, and have the normal number of fingers, toes, and ears.
Grandma D’s father was a “Tyler” (not the real last name.) Grandma D’s mother’s mother was also a “Tyler”–same Tylers, cousins somewhere along the way.
My mother got pregnant in college with me/almost had an abortion, and I’ve never known my biological father, but she married when I was 3 and I was adopted by my stepfather, henceforth referred to as Dad. Dad and Mom divorced when I was 12. Dad remarried Stepmom J. Mom was Stepmom J’s math teacher in high school.
Cousin Bobbi Jo (not real name, but it is a double first name) got married at 13. At the age of 15, she’d had enough of being a housewife and ran away to join the circus, leaving her husband and 3 children behind. They caught up with her a few towns later and brought her back–not sure if she ever made it to the circus.
I don’t live in Kentucky either…but I do live in Alabama.
My uncle by marriage was engaged to Aunt #1, had sex with her underage sister (Aunt #2) then proceeded to marry Aunt #1. They subsequently divorced 20 years later and he married Aunt #2. They divorced after he was accused of “unseemly” behavior with his niece. And we’re from Georgia (cue Dueling Banjos).
Oh, Elle. Where to start. I actually just typed out two paragraphs, and erased them. Just the tip of the iceberg, but sounds totally over the top made up. Sad but true.
Despite the Georgia thing, Lyndsey might have beat ya.
I guess I mean Alabama.
ahh, but mine are all nearly immediate family. Hers are greats for the most part and her family is from the south. And I’m not done yet.
Does it count that my Uncle Billy (his real name) lays out in the yard in a lawn chair with a big ole’ nine volt flashlight signaling the “aliens”?
I could go into more sordid details about the uncle twice over and his penchant for young girls, but this IS a family site!!
I’m so proud of my family!! YEE-HAW!!
Story #1
When I was like eight years old, my grandmother (my mother’s mom – who lived in Florida – we used to drive from Wisconsin most summers) kicked us out of her house (wait, it was actually a trailer park retirement community) because we “ruined” her “good” margarine containers when we used them to build sandcastles on the beach. We stayed at the hotel the rest of the trip.
Story #2
Another trip my parents sneaked us out of the house, um trailer, one night to a hotel because they were afraid that my manic depressive aunt was going to stab us all to death (presumably due to jealousy that my mom – her sister – had a husband and three kids – and she had none). (The aunt got messed up sometime in the 50s after undergoing electric shock treatments for depression and drinking.)
The only thing I can say here is…. phew!
Well, then I think Tricia got ya.
We have successfully proven that you don’t have to be from the South to have messed up family stories! Thank you, Elle!! ๐ As a sidenote, I don’t have any stories (that I know of) that could top any of these. And…*gasp!* I’m from Alabama! This has definitely been a fun contest to read. ๐
I got nothing to top these… but still have some doozies
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